Crafty Cuteness

So this past weekend was a beautiful weekend with temperatures in the low 70's / high 60's -- beautiful baseball playing weather!

Bebe and Mamu also went and got the mail for me -- they do this almost every day. :)

I also had a vision - if you will - of a new memo board. If you remember that Mensa's going to be calling any day now, here's why:

--I decided I would start a J collection. I already had the one on the right side, but got the other two on sale half off at Hobby Lobby.

--Here's my new memo board! I totally couldn't have done it without Jason and Auntie. It was a living, breathing being. Totally not the idea I started with, but once I got to Hobby Lobby and found the twoile (totally didn't spell that right) ribbon it came together. Jason gets props for the placement of the J's.

--Here's the memo board with the other accents on that wall in my kitchen. I love it!

--And it didn't take long to add my photos to it. (Jason really likes this memo board because I love the J's so much, that I won't add as many photos to it so they won't get covered up.)

We also had a bit of fun this past week playing dress up (he's Dad) and helping Mom with the dishes.

Mamu also got in a bit of driving practice this weekend. (It's how I get him to behave in the store - if you're good, you can drive the van!)

And here's your laughs for the day:

1st laugh of the day: This past weekend Mamu was talking about how much he LOVES to be "nekie" (aka - naked). He made up a little nekie song and everything! It goes something like "I love nekie! I be nekie all day long! I no wear pants."

I said "You have to wear pants."

Mamu: "I be nekie!"

Me: "You don't live in a compound. You have to wear pants."

(Sidebar- Jason informed me when I was retelling this story to Auntie that I should have said commune. Oh well. Ding. Dong. Mensa's here!)

2nd laugh of the day:

As we were driving to get Mamu from school today, Bebe asked "What's that song? I know that song."

Me: "What song?"

Bebe: "The one on the radio."

**Now if you've ever ridden with me, you would know that when ANYONE else is in the car (ie-not just me) you can't hear the music. I keep it very low so I can hear people talking to me - so it's pretty impossible she's hearing the radio -- especially with her hearing problems. Now back to the regularly scheduled programming.**

Bebe: "Oh. Wait. The song's in my head. I think I heard it in Music today."

You're welcome.

Ding, Dong - Mensa's Calling!

So, yesterday, I woke up at 7 ish to get Mamu up (who announces "I got to go potty!" -- he knows it'll bring you running every time. BTW - he's already gone in his diaper) and then I was resting while he watched Mickey Mouse and I came up with an idea for a new memo board I wanted to make.

I loaded up the kids to go to Hobby Lobby (Jason had a production board meeting, so we were on our own) and took the appropriate provisions with us: 2 water bottles, 2 snack containers filled with goldfish and pretzels, and 2 bags of VeggieTales fruit snacks. Mamu just doesn't seem to enjoy Hobby Lobby as much as I do (I know! I can't believe it either! ;) ), so I have to take provisions and plan my route accordingly.

We got some great things for my memo board and some other stuff that was all 50% off! (Love those sales!). I should finish the last thing from that buying trip tomorrow and I'll post all of it.

Now you're thinking, "Umm...so why are you telling me all of this when I won't be rewarded with a photograph or even a hint of what it is? Do you really think a cliffhanger will work? Because it won't crazy lady."

Well, you need to know this back story so things would make a little more sense to you. See? It's all for you!

SO, anyways, Auntie came over last night to hang out with me and I roped her into helping me with this project. I told her that I broke my hair clip and when she asked how, I told her that it was so intelligently done, that Mensa was sending out a special team (like the Publisher's Clearinghouse except instead of a giant check, they would give me a giant calculator or something. Or I guess Mensa people don't need calculators, so maybe a protractor...). I then re-enacted how I broke my clip (by hitting my head on the top of the van) and she agreed that we shouldn't go to dinner, we should wait for Mensa.

Well, since we had the children and Jason to feed, we went to dinner anyways. We figured that Mensa would just leave a note like UPS does - "Sorry we missed you." -- The note must have blown away...

So while doing this project last night, Auntie and I had several moments where we KNEW that Mensa was totally going to invite us to join the sub-sub-sub-sub-sub committee under the sub-sub-sub cabinet (meeting location in the women's restroom at Arby's). Here are some (NOT all) of our (mostly mine) Mensa moments from last night:

Moment #1: Jason was helping (OK - he took over at the end... while shaking his head several times) and asked me to put some hot glue on a certain spot. Well, I put it on top of the paper instead of under...and then wiped it off with my finger. Yup. I totally burned myself.

Moment #2: I was promising Jason that I had cut a slit in a part. (I hadn't, but sure did insist that I did - for like 5 minutes!)

Moment #3: I totally said "I'm a genius" and then Jason had to fix what I had just done.

I promise you that they were way funnier last night. NO. There wasn't that much wine involved...

By the way, I'm totally still waiting for Mensa to show up.

:) I promise I'll do my best to post pictures of the completed Mensa project tomorrow!

The Entertainers

So, we're a pretty typical family. We've got 2 kids (one of each) and we do a lot of things together, like going to the grocery store, the park, etc.

Well, sometimes we like to entertain the people that are around us in the grocery store, park, mall, dr.'s office, etc.

We don't plan it (there's no strategy session at home where I give assignments like "Bebe, you make sure to stick your hands in your pants to scratch your backside." or "Mamu, make sure you yell 'Squishy! Squishy!' while patting my chest.") -- it just happens.

So, here are some funny things we did to entertain people at Kroger this past visit:

Kroger has these little carts that are just for kids. They're like regular carts, only shrunk down to kid level. They're really cute. Both of my kids LOVE them and it is a sad day when there are none to be had. Well, luckily both kids got one to drive around the store. So here I look like a Momma duck with two little cart ducklings behind me. (BTW-We have figured out how to 'hook' one of the little carts to the big cart... we spend way too much time at Kroger.) So, Mamu, being 2, sometimes is ummm... 'unable'? to steer his cart in an orderly fashion. Which leads to the little cart either being:

A) hooked onto the big cart (which Mamu now knows how to unhook it from the cart)

or

B) one of us helping him push it (which usually happens).

Well, it was my turn to 'help' Mamu with his little cart. In order to help him with his cart, you have to lean over and place your hand on his little hands (which he likes) and help him drive. Yes. Lean... which means your (not so cute) little (ok, not so little) heiny is stuck up in the air and you're walking with your legs spread out like a crazy person, because that's just how you walk when you're hunched over a 2 ft tall grocery cart.

Guess how many people we see in the store that we know? Yup. Lots.

Guess how many parents / former parents in that I know and have taught their child? 3

Guess how embarrassed I am? Not so much really. I just brush it off as part of being a 2 year old's mom. A 2 year old BOY's mom.

Also, if you don't know, it's a very boring time at the Kroger for a 2 year old child when they are not using a little cart and are stuck in the big cart. It's even worse when your mom won't let you crawl out and scream like a banshee. So, being the ever creative mom, I make up songs for him. Such hits include:

"Where is the milk?" sung to "If You're Happy and You Know It"

"Can You Find the Cheese?" sung to "Can You Feel the Love Tonight" from the Lion King

and my most favorite:

"Where is ____?" (Whatever you are looking for at that moment) sung to "Where is Thumbkin?"

These work for exactly 5.8 seconds until you hit shuffle on your brain and come up with the next song. At which the lovely lady (who is not in her hoodie and yoga pants with her flat hair) pushing the cart past you just smiles and politely calls "the come and get 'em crazy people" and says "Please come take this crazy lady away." SHE obviously doesn't have small children.

"Yes. That crazy lady is my mom. I still give her kisses."

Another place we entertained people this past weekend was at the mall.

Bebe had a "Stuff for Stuff" coupon from Build a Bear workshop because we spend money there all.the.time. Well, not all the time, but it sure feels like it. So, she got to pick out something that was $10 or less. She found a little Bear MP3 player that plays little songs for you and your build a bear (or bunny, or anything else you've stuffed there). It even has cute little (nonworking) ear buds for your bear to wear. So the music comes out a little speaker so you too! can enjoy the music with your bear. So, she was super excited about this and at some point held it up to her ear like a 1988 jam box and beebopped her little bottom, hips, and did some sort of jive (thanks to those dance lessons I've been paying for -- for 5 years) as we're leaving the food court. Then she puts it up to my ear and has me dance along as well. I don't have near the moves that she does, but I did my best. I'm sure there were many tweens that were mortified by me (btw, I was pushing the sit 'n stand stroller with Mamu in the front), but I didn't care. I'm just glad Beebs wants me to be with her in the mall.

"Yes. I got my mom to make a fool out of herself. I know. I'm good."

So there you've got it.

Free entertainment.

You just have to find us.


(We're probably at Kroger.)

Sock Monkeys, A Mug, and Toy Story

So here's what we've been up to this weekend (I know you've been eagerly awaiting this news!):


It's been cold this weekend. Actually all week (since the snow last weekend), it's been super duper cold, so I've been sporting these cuties:
Mamu helped me pick them out and loves that he has a sock monkey and I've got sock monkey slippers.

The kids have been a smidgent bummed that we can't go outside since it's
A: Super Duper Cold
B: It's raining.
So, they've been playing a lot. Toy Story Toys are popular right now and so was Thomas and pals. I just got the Toy Story guys:
(Sorry about the ghostly white children - we haven't been outside in awhile...)





I've been cooking and have continued the tradition I started last year: New Recipe Sundays (also known as, the children cry a lot at dinner on Sundays since it's something new to eat and we.don't.like.change.) I've actually lucked out - the last 2 weekends, there has been minimal, if any crying. I think it helps that I've told them It's National No Crying at Dinner Day.

Tonight's new recipe was a Taco Skillet. I had a flying pig and Rex to help me make it. They were very helpful. At one point, Jessie and Bullseye were going to come help too, but they had to go home. (These are all Toy Story characters for those of you who have successfully avoided the Toy Story empire.) I even got to use my new holders that I got for Christmas! --They're actually photo holders, but I use them for recipes.


I had a snack that reminded me of my sister and our year that we spent in Malaysia. When I was about Bebe's age, we moved to Malaysia for a year. (Go ahead and google Malaysia if you need to; I'll wait.) My dad worked at a university for a year helping get the engineering program going and teaching. We lived in a very nice house and had a nanny/housekeeper/amah named Tulesi (I probably spelled that wrong). She was friends with the Chinese amah next door who worked for the businessmen who lived there. They always had American food - Coke especially. (You need that information for later in the story.) Tulesi and the Chinese amah would talk and play with my sister who was 6 months - 1 year while we were over there. Everyone LOVED her with her blue eyes and blonde hair - she was considered good luck. I can't remember how many restaurant kitchens she toured and how many shopkeepers just wanted to touch her. (I was a tad jealous at the time, but we've moved on.) At one point, I was playing/watching my sister on the front porch when the Chinese amah came over. Well, she brought me a can of coke and an apple, gave them to me, and took my sister. There was a pretty big language barrier (like, she spoke Chinese and I spoke English), so I was pretty sure I traded my sister for a Coke and an apple. At that time, I thought it was a pretty good trade. (She just took her to play with her - she didn't kidnap her or anything. I think my mom came out and asked where my sister was and I told her I traded her. I'm pretty sure that's when my mom went and got her back.) SO, when I had my Dr. Pepper and apple for a snack today, I thought about that. Yeah. I digressed.




Bebe has caught the crafting bug and has really gotten into embroidery. Auntie has just started doing embroidery and has taught Bebe how to do it. I'm pretty sure this was Auntie's to start off with and Bebe hijacked it and finished it. We went this weekend to get her own supplies and she picked some horses to do. Here's her first finished project:

(I'm not sure why she looks drugged or dazed here.... but it's the only picture I got with her and her finished project.)

Bebe also surprised me with this mug she made for me! On Friday, she stayed at the house with Auntie while I worked (it was a teacher work day for me and the kids had off) and decided to use her clay she got from Aunt Taffy (it's her Great Aunt on my side). Apparently this had been planned since Wednesday when Auntie took Bebe to dance. I love it!

We've had a pretty fun weekend so far! We've got one more day with all of us off with Martin Luther King holiday tomorrow -- we don't have any definite plans, but I'm sure something will be fun! Oh! I'm throwing them a curve ball and doing another new recipe tomorrow night. Those loud wails you here will be my children crying about two new foods back to back...

**disclaimer - they didn't cry tonight. They actually liked it -- but they won't admit it.

Humorful parts of my day

Here's how my morning started:

(Well, after I got out of bed and blurrily looked through my half-opened eyes at the 'lovely' face staring me back in the mirror.)

I was going to let Bebe sleep in a bit since we had a work day (which means the teachers party; ahem.... I mean work, while the kids have the day off) and I had to go into work and I felt bad that she (being a teacher's kid) had to go to school (even if it was only for an hour before Auntie came and got her), but she got up before me! (OK - enough rambling)

Well, while I was curling my hair, I hear a crash in the kitchen.

I know that Bebe wants to help me out and she loves to set up my breakfast in the morning, so I figured that a bowl broke.

Since I am a Mother of the Year candidate, I made sure to continue to curl my hair while I waited for her to come report to me what happened. (FYI-Mamu was still in bed, so no danger to him at this time.)

Well, Bebe came in, with tears running down her cheeks... "Mom... I broke your favorite Eeyore glass. I was trying to get it for you and it fell over my shoulder and it broke. I'm sorry. It was an accident."

I reassured her that I loved her and that it was ok and I would go sweep up the glass and could she please go talk to her brother for a moment while I finished curling my hair. Mamu had just woken up (or chosen to let us know that he was awake) and starts yelling "I go POTTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY!"

Now, half my hair is curled, I have broken glass to sweep up in the kitchen, a 2 year old to take to the potty and a crying 7 year old.

All before 6:30 am.

Fabulous.

Now, let's fast forward to dinner.

We went to Jason's Deli since you know, it's "Daddy's Deli" (you know, because his name is Jason) and while we're there I ended up holding Mamu. Mamu is a little under the weather and a tad part cranky (read - more than usual) and he was done eating and becoming a smidgent more cantankerous (read-super duper crabby), so I picked him up and was holding him.

[Now, as a disclaimer, I was very fortunate to breastfeed both of my children for over a year.]

At some point, Mamu slides his hand down the front of my shirt.

Inside my shirt.

In the middle of Jason's Deli, where I am already calling attention to myself by standing up, swaying with a 2 year old who is doing his best to make everyone know that he's there.

So now my 2 year old is feeling me up in Jason's Deli and he has begun to pat me.

So I pull his hand out of my shirt and gently tell him that "That cow's been sold." and "Sorry bud, but they're all dried up."

Then, he decides to pat me on the outside of my shirt, saying "Squishy! Squishy! Squishy!"

We called it a night.

"Squishy! Squishy! Squishy!"

My kids want me to be fat...

My kids want me to be fat.

No really.

Every time I get ready to go to the gym while they're still awake, there is crying. Real tears and everything. Usually it's just Bebe. She tears up when she sees me tie my shoes and get my MP3 player.

Bebe: "Why?"

Me: "Because I would like to exercise."

Bebe: "Oh. Why?"

Me: "It keeps me healthy and it relaxes me."

Bebe: "Oh. Are you sure?"

Me: "Yes."

Bebe: "Oh." (tears continue to well up)

Now, it's not like I just up and leave during the middle of dinner or anything. I usually don't go until it's Bebe's shower time. She's in the shower, getting dressed for bed, and having stories read to her when I get home. It's not like I just run away or something.

Well, tonight, Bebe was at dance and I planned to go while she was there since Auntie was bringing her home (partially so she wouldn't give me grief --Bebe, not Auntie).

Apparently, Bebe and Mamu have been planning and having strategy sessions, because he wailed when I tied up my shoes and got my MP3 player. He's usually already asleep when I leave, but I went early tonight. He cried. He got in my lap and said "Momma. You no go gym." There was a wail I could hear outside.of.the.house when I left.

Apparently, I while I was gone and sweating to the oldies... or the show on channel 8, Mamu cried. He cried the whole.blasted.time. According to Jason, Mamu said he was sad because of the door.

(As retold by Jason)

Mamu: (Insert crying)

Jason: "Why are you sad?"

Mamu: "Cause"

Jason: "Because why?"
Mamu: "Because the door"

Jason: (insert chuckle) "Why are you sad at the door?"
Mamu: "Because Momma closed it and went away!"

Jason: "Momma will be back."

Mamu: "No! She hiding."

And, now you know why my kids want me to be fat. I'll now have to go through stealth training in order to get to the gym.

"See Mamu? If you see Mom put on her tennis shoes AND get her music player,

cry. Cry like you have never cried before. And beg. Begging is good."

Letters in my head...

So, I've told you in the past that I sometimes send voicemails / texts in my head; I also compose letters! (I know -- multitalented!) I thought I could share some of them with you from the past couple of days: Enjoy the craziness!

Dear Lady at Kroger in her workout clothes with her 4(?) year old child curled up in the small seat,

Yes. It is New Year's Eve. The grocery store is busy. Get over it. Stop complaining to the food, cans, etc. that you should have come last night. You apparently made a sad choice and also forgot to watch the weather this morning since you are wearing your workout shorts and UGG knock-offs. I'm sorry that we keep meeting in every aisle, and it's not my fault that you can't manage your time.

Thanks!

Emily (the lady driving the giant yellow car cart with a small cart being pushed behind her with two very well behaved children.

Dear Man at Kroger in a hooded sweatshirt with the hood UP,

Sir, the wearing of the hood up inside is not good. You look the uni-bomber. The dark circles around your eyes aren't helping you out at all. Please remove your hood.

Thank you,

Emily (the lady who doesn't look like the uni-bomber)

Dear PBSKids,

I LOVE you. No, really. I LOVE YOU! Thank you for educational, entertaining shows with no commericals so my children can watch a smidgent of TV without me.

Forever yours,

Emily (the grateful mom)

Dear Bebe,

I love you and all of your artistic abilities. However, if you could NOT leave the large pair of scissors where your brother can get them, please do so - that would be awesome. Also, I love all of your art work - just not scattered across the living room floor.

Love,

Mom (the evil vacuum lady)

Dear Mamu,

I love you. Please don't pick up the large pair of scissors your sister left on the floor in the living room and run. Especially, please don't run around the living room with the scissors yelling "Cut! Cut! Cut!"

Love,

Mom (the scissor remover)

Dear Jason,

Thank you so much for putting up with my version of crazy. You don't care if I bust out into song, run to Target at 8 pm on a Wednesday evening, or do yoga moves in the middle of the living room with my mother and sister on New Year's Eve (without any sort of adult beverages involved). Thanks for putting up with my crazy phobias (like not putting away the FSA bought items until today in case we would have to return them if we went to the hospital before midnight Dec. 31) and my crazy ideas (that whole rearrange the craft closet at 9:30 pm thing). You are truly a trooper, especially when I "rawr" at you in an attempt to be a cougar (which I will apparently never become). Thanks for putting up with my crazy voicemails and texts on dance nights (when I for sure have decided that you forgot to pick up Mamu). I love you and love that you embrace the craziness.

Love,

Your ever so slightly off her rocker wife

Dear self,

It is NOT a good idea to go to Kroger on any sort of "Eve" -- Christmas, New Year's, Groundhog's, Valentine's, or Labor. Especially twice. You will run into crazy workout lady who mutters about her lack of time management and the uni-bomber's older, slightly more saner cousin.

Love,

You

Dear Twisted Sister & Uncle Mark,

Thanks for the Christmas album! I love it!

Love,

Emily (the lover of odd Christmas songs)